I’ve been struggling a bit the last few days… I’ve had some fairly intense free floating anxiety, along with a general feeling of being overwhelmed. I’m not sure what’s causing it, and I’m not even sure that that’s the right question to be asking. Instead of focusing on the cause I need to turn my attention torch what I should be doing about it.
This may come as a shock to those of you who know me but I’m not exactly a relaxed and groovy kind of guy. I am at a fairly high intensity interval all the time. It suits me. I spent several years trying to be relaxed and groovy but it was hopeless. I like being busy, I like being focused, but I am not very good at self-care. My tendency when things like this happen is to lean in and push harder hoping I can push my way through to the other side. Sometimes that works… But not today.
So I’m trying to be gentle with myself. What is another thing I’m not all that good at… at all. I still get a fair amount of my self-worth and emotional security from taking care of business, so taking it easy on myself and giving myself permission not to get much done is tough one. Tough but necessary.
So, no intense workouts today. I’m going to go do a half hour meditation in the sauna at lunch. It can’t hurt… With any luck by tomorrow or the next day instead of being overwhelmed I’ll just be whelmed. Body, mind, spirit. Gotta pay attention to all three.