When you lose something it’s usually a good idea to try and retrace your steps – the thing I lost has to be back along the path somewhere, right?. And sometimes on a journey if you get off track, it’s best to just go back to the beginning. That seems to be what I’m doing right now
For the last couple of weeks it feels like I’ve sort of lost the thread. I don’t even know if I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing or not. Which usually means I’m not. “Hoping for the best” is not a concept I am comfortable with. I need more clarity than that. So I’m going back to doing the things I was doing when I knew it was working.
To that end, I’m back at the gym every day at lunch, and I’m trying to remember that I’m starting over so I don’t jump back in where I left off and hurt myself. 40 minutes of cardio, Monday through Friday. Getting out of the office, burning some calories. Clearing my head and working up a sweat. I really like doing this,which begs the question “Why did I stop?” I have also decided to go ahead and start doing my morning walks again even though it’s pretty hot. I brought a t-shirt to change into, and some baby wipes, and I will cool back off eventually.
I just need to keep moving. It doesn’t have to be too strenuous or intense, just consistent. I have no real interest in building up any of my major muscles, and the Pilates I’m doing at Redbird is really starting to show in my core and stabilizer muscles. Hell, I am even starting to have a six pack. Admittedly it’s still wrapped in a koozie, but I can actually see the muscles in my abs for the first time in, I don’t know… Ever. How cool is that?
I’m hoping getting back into regular exercise will help me better on track with my food as well. Haven’t been eating too badly but it could still use some improvement. In fact, it’s the area where I need the most work… I am finding a new freedom around exercise and my body, but freedom from compulsive eating remains elusive. I have to believe that there is a way out and I’m going to keep on looking until I find it.